Interview with Kate Winslet on her new film Revloutionary Road

Q: Hi Kate. Congratulations on Revolutionary Road and all of the awards you have collected for it.

A: Thank you very much.

Q: It has been a huge year for you. You have won almost every award open to an actress. What do the awards mean to you?

A: A lot. They mean a lot to me. You're only human. You know, at a certain point when a particular group of people get together and decide you're worthy of that level of recognition and you've been doing this as long as I have and working very hard, it really means a lot. Of course it does. And these are all people within my industry, my peers, people I really admire and respect. It really means a lot.

Q: Some actresses go through their careers dreaming of being cast in films as challenging as Revolutionary Road and The Reader. You starred in both the same year.

A: I'm really lucky because I feel as I'm getting older, the roles I'm being offered are actually getting more and more interesting. For me as an actress, the challenges get bigger and bigger all the time and I'm just so lucky that is the case. The fact that in the space of less than a year I got to play April Wheeler (Revolutionary Road) and Hanna Schmitz (The Reader). The fact an actress gets to play those two characters in their lifetime let alone in one year, that just doesn't even add up.

Q: Revolutionary Road examines turmoil in what appears to a happy marriage. You made the film with your director husband Sam Mendes. Did it shake your belief in marriage at all? Do you still believe in marriage?

A: Do I still believe in marriage? Yeah! My god, of course, yes, absolutely.. (laughs)

Q: Some would say the book and film do not paint a very positive picture of marriage.

A: To me it's a portrait of a marriage. It's a study of one specific couple who are in that level of relationship crisis and it's set in a time when men and women, especially women had extremely limited choices. Life dictated that you should be happy with your lot in life. You should accept the way it is and be content, but April's interior world is so much bigger than her exterior world and she just can't sit and suffer in silence. She is deeply unhappy, she is lonely, but she loves Frank. She does want it to be okay. This isn't a story about two people who want to separate and don't want to be together anymore. They actually are trying to do whatever they can in order to stay together. They just want to find a different future for themselves. They want to find something more than what they have. I can really understand that. I think that's a lot of the reason why people seem to be really relating to this film. These two characters ­ there is nothing worse than living a life you feel you shouldn't be living and feeling trapped in that life, whether it's because of your job, your relationship, your marriage or whatever it may be. It may even be simply the country you live in. Everyone needs something to hope for.

Q: Has it happened to you ­ where you wanted to be some place different in life?

A: To me, I think that's what life is about. Until you actually reach a point where you really know what it is to be happy, I think life is about working through those times. It's to do with figuring out who you are. I think we all have experienced moments where you feel you're in the wrong job, country, relationship, whatever. Everyone knows what that feels like ­ either to be with the wrong person or not on the path you had hoped your life might be taking. So yes, of course, I've been in those positions.

Q: We watch the pain April goes through in attempting to conform to a relationship. How far would you conform to be in a relationship?

A: Oh my god, I would never conform. I can't do the conforming thing, actually at all in life.

Q: Can you elaborate on that a little bit?

A: I'm just not the kind of person who lives by other people's judgments or opinions. Not at all. That's in life and in relationships. I'm not. I dance to the beat of my own drum and I think that's really important for humanity. I think that's really important for people. I'm lucky I can do that. There are so many young women in the world who are so fragile emotionally that they can't do that. They can't believe in themselves and they can't say "Fuck it. This is what I'm wearing today and I don't care what anyone thinks." And that's on a very superficial level.

Q: Where does it come from ­ that strength?

A: I think it comes from my parents. It really does come from my parents on a very solid, very normal family upbringing. I had two parents who always said "Go for it, go for it. What do you care if it doesn't work out? You're never going to know until you try." I remember my dad would drive my sister and I to auditions and I would know that I was completely never going to get these parts because I was always so sort of slightly overweight and you know, wearing the right outfit. I would say "Daddy, I'm never going to get this part" and he would say (brightens her voice) "That's not what you're here for. Come on! You're here for the experience. What do you care? Have a laugh. Just enjoy yourself. It doesn't matter." That attitude of it doesn't matter, just be yourself, I've literally been taught that all my life and my dad still says that to me now.

Q: When you don't like to conform, does that cause friction or backlash?

A: What do I mean by not conforming? I don't mean rebelling. I'm a little too old for that frankly. In terms of not conforming, I will not starve myself as we all know. I just won't be anything that other people necessarily expect me to be and I'll just be myself. Also, for any relationship to work I think you have to be yourself otherwise you're compromising your true self. And that is April Wheeler. That's it, right there. And look what happens to her. She spends so many years losing touch with her soul that she ends up becoming suicidal and going slightly insane. I think the most important thing in life is to be true to you. I think it's hard to do that because we live in an incredibly judgmental world these days, particularly in the world of celebrity, unbelievably judgmental. It does actually make me really sad. I think wouldn't it be nice if we all could just be exactly who we are and really not have to think for two seconds about what we're wearing or what we're saying or what we're doing. Wouldn't it be great if we all could be free and be ourselves? But no, life isn't like that it seems to me these days. Very judgmental society we live in today.

Q: Do you teach it to your kids as well? To be independent.

A: I do. I absolutely do.

Q: Working with Sam ... did you think it might be risky for your relationship? Did it place pressure on your relationship?

A: No it didn't. It didn't have any impact on our marriage in a negative way at all. It really genuinely didn't. All it did was that it's made everything much more fulfilling and much more positive for both Sam and I. I could imagine what he'd be like as a director, I could see how brilliant he was from the plays he's done and the movies he's directed. It was very clear to me that here is a spectacular director of film and theatre. But until I was actually working with him I could never know what it really felt like. I could never really know what happens to Sam when he goes into that mode. So for me, it was like "Ah okay." The final piece of the puzzle was put into place and it was really wonderful for me to work with him and to watch him work.

Q: What amazed you the most about his directing style?

A: To see how he was with other actors is just amazing to me because he is different with every actor depending on the character they are playing, the type of actor they are. There were many things that were really eye opening for me about my husband but they were all very, very positive things. We didn't suddenly begin analysing our own marriage. All we felt was "Oh my god, we're so lucky." (laughs)

Q; Was there anything surprising working with Leonardo again?

A: With Leo there's a surprise every day. I have just seen him get better and better. I didn't even think that was possible because he was so amazing, but over the last 12 years I've seen him go from strength to strength and I really do believe he is the best actor of his generation and I feel very very proud to have had two opportunities now to have worked alongside him. He's incredibly professional, he's unbelievably brave.

Q: Surely one thing surprised you. It has been more than a decade since you both starred in Titanic. The two of you were quite young back then.

A: The only surprise really was just how close we really are. We've remained very good friends and we really trust each other. When we were on set and shooting some of those very difficult scenes in Revolutionary Road, we have a sort of language of our own like a private secret language (laughs) or something. I was surprised at how present that was within our relationship and it was great to have the history that we have and the chemistry that we have, in being able to play these two characters because there were no boundaries at all. We could do anything, try anything, we never felt stupid. We feel so comfortable with each other. I know that I would let Leo physically harm me if it meant he had to do something for a scene and I know that he would feel the same way. It is a very rare friendship that we have and we used all of it in Frank and April. I actually feel maybe we wouldn't have been able to do it if we didn't have it.

Q: Why did it take you so long to work with Leo again?

A: We had offers over the years. There were a few things that came our way and a few things we talked about and we just never really felt like it was absolutely the right thing and I think we both knew that, you know, we could never match Titanic. I mean, I always felt quite selfishly about working with Leo again. I thought, if I am going to work with him again, I want to be in every single scene with him, I want to be on set with him every single day and I want to be able to go as far emotionally as two characters could possibly go because I know we'll have much more of a rewarding time doing that. We were just very very lucky that Revolutionary Road came along and we honestly looked at each other and said "This is that thing we said we might one day be able to do." We were just very lucky..

Q: Was Sam already attached?

A: No. The material came to me first with nobody attached at all. I thought "My god I have to somehow hang onto this." That's very rare, that an actress is able to attach herself to a project where there's no director and no other actors involved at all. I was just very lucky that when Sam agreed to do it, he didn't say not to have me (laughs) in it. He decided to keep me and to cast Leo as Frank which was just music to my ears. That was my fantasy. I'm still in a state where I can't believe that dream actually came true. It really was like a dream.

Q: What about your kids? You've worked a lot recently and I recently read how you went away for three months.

A: I didn't go away from home for a few months, at all. In Vanity Fair it said I went away for five months and that is completely untrue. Believe me, I'm happy to correct it. The funny thing is from the outside looking in it does look like I've been very busy, but the truth is I probably ­ the only reason to me I felt busier is that I didn't have much break between Revoloutionary Road and The Reader. It was only about seven months which for me is not very long at all. Usually I would take 10 months to a year, so that was quite fast turnaround for me. Revolutionary Road we were all together, me, Sam and the kids in Connecticut where we were filming, we were all together every day. With The Reader, it was a juggle and it was a choice I had to make. My daughter is eight now. I can't pull her away from school and just go wherever. She has her friends. Routine for my children is very important.

Q: With your status in Hollywood you could pretty much demand a schedule that suits your family commitments.

A: Yes. I am very lucky to be in a position where I can say to the producers "Help me here. Let's figure this out. I can't come away for three months. That is not going to happen. So how do we do it?" What we did for The Reader was I went away for two weeks on my own and then Sam and the kids came for two weeks, then I brought them home and then I turned around the next day and went back, just because I can't have my children go on an airplane without me (laughs). So Sam was flying them in, then he had to go work somewhere, so then I flew them back, turn around the next day and went straight to the set in Cologne, and shot for another two weeks. Two weeks was the longest and then we actually had a two month hiatus and then we went back to the set and they had broken up for the summer time so they were with me for the whole month. It was two sets of two weeks. That's all I actually had. Still, I felt like it was a long time. They were fine. I was the one who was missing everybody and wondering if everyone had the right things in their packed lunches. Had they handed their library books back in? There were notices up everywhere on the door "Have you brushed your teeth?" and a big picture of a smile and a toothbrush, pictures of books. Library books Monday. What days they had PE, things like that.

Q: You sound very organised?

A: Well, when I did have to go away for The Reader or even if I have to go to England and do press for two days, or LA for two days, they have to understand what I am doing and they have to understand what goes on when I'm not there. So they do. We have a routine. It's not regimented. We're not fascists about it but kids do like to know what time dinner is and what time bedtime is.

Q: Do you live in New York, Los Angeles or London?

A: We actually don't. We divide our time between New York and England, so no fixed abode.

Q: Do you think happiness is dependent on circumstances or is it an inside job?

A: I think April's unhappiness begins when she is very, very young. In the Revolutionary Road novel, April's back story is that she was abandoned by her parents when she was very young, so she never had a mother and a father. Her mother died and her father was a travelling salesman and an alcoholic. She was raised by an elderly aunt, so she was always searching for something. She was always looking for love, she was always looking for family. She was always searching for her identity. It's way into her adult years and she is still trying to find that identity. So April's deep well of inner unhappiness is enormous and I think that as a person you can find happiness but you have to have some sense of who you are before you do that. Otherwise you're latching onto the wrong thing in order to make yourself happy. It's perfectly possible in a marriage, and I'm very happy that I can say this, that being married to Sam has made me happier than ever in my own life. But you have to have a sense of who you are before you really find that. That's difficult.

But I also think that in the case of Frank and April, was them falling in love just circumstantial? Is falling in love circumstantial? Is it just to do with the circumstances of our own lives, whether you've just walked away from a relationship that's completely broken your heart and then you latch onto whoever comes along because they seem like the person your mother said you ought to marry? There are so many things that play a part in when you really meet that person and fall in love with that person. For April, I think there are so many circumstances throughout her life, throughout her childhood. Up to the point of meeting Frank, she is just looking for somebody like him, someone who's glamorous, more glamorous than everybody else, who she can be glamorous with too.